This is my life as it comes hurdling by....

Wednesday, June 15, 2011


If there is something I'm really good at, it's sharing my feelings. For me, this is a new set of feelings to share. I don't know what to say, so I'll start from the beginning.

April 2002- Warrensburg, MO

I decided the three jobs I was working wasn't enough; two bar tending jobs and a before and after school program teacher. I knew I was busy but for some reason I thought I should get a cat. I went to the Warrensburg Humane Society and immediately veered toward a kennel of kittens. I was told ALL of the kittens in this kennel were from the same litter which surprised me because there was maybe 9 total! I didn't realize that was possible?! I watched them play with each other and quickly realized I couldn't just have one, I needed two. How could one live alone after having all these siblings to run and chase?! I sat back and watched for awhile as these kittens skidded and scampered around the cage. After a few minutes I realized I kept watching the same two kittens. One was a black kitten ( who obviously didn't make the final cut) and the other was little Melvin. While all the other kittens were total spazzes, he was calm, cool and collected. He sat where he was and did what he wanted without a care in the world. I knew that very day he was going to be mine.

May 2002, Warrensburg, MO

The day I get to pick my kittens up from the kennel! I found out there was another person looking at one of the kittens I was wanting. At this point, I was in love with Melvin. I couldn't handle the thought of someone else taking him home and I panicked. Luckily, it was the black kitten instead of Melvin. Oh how life has a way of working things out.

May 2002-June 2011

Melvin was a cat FULL of surprises. He was definitely the more shy of the two. He wasn't as forward as Otis but he knew when he liked someone. He absolutely loved getting brushed and could sit for super long periods of time if he knew you were getting the comb out. Any time he heard the can opener, he thought it meant tuna and would run into the kitchen crying for just a bite. You would think bringing a dog and two children into his world he would change but no- he accepted both parties completely. Not once did he ever bite or scratch either one of my children. He would lay and let them pet him and if they got too rough, he would just get up and leave. How polite! If only I could teach that lesson to the kids at my school.......He was super awesome at head butts and face grazing- his way of letting you know he was feeling what you were feeling. Snuggling.....I can't even type it without the tears running down my face. Perfiect 10. Amazing. Melvin made a habit of sleeping every night on my pillow. That is actually how I came to find out he was missing. I can't go into detail about what happened because it is pretty traumatic- seriously. It was a freak accident that won't ever be completely explained or understood.

I can't tell you how many tears I shed when I found out he was missing, but it is nothing compared to the amount I have shed now that I know he is gone forever. I am so, so sad. Sleeping is super rough and I have no idea what to tell my boys. I can't tell if Caiden is more worried about me or Melvin (MOTY= this girl!)

What I have learned is that when I love- I love deep. My heart aches as though I have lost a child. He may have just been a cat but I loved him like he was my own flesh and blood. I will never forget him and how he has taught me to love unconditionally.

I miss you Melvin and love you with all of my heart.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

A Post So Random It Doesn't Really Deserve A Title But I'll Give It One Anyway...Yeah.

I'm so tired, I could fall asleep standing up! We have so much going on- who doesn't! I have been really enjoying the moments I have with my kids but I have also been embracing the ones where it is just me and I can sit, read, shower or go to bed!

Some things I have going on right now:

I started Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. She has kicked my ass 2 days in a row now- and I love it! I have been wanting to get back into working out and it feels really good to be sore.

Summer school is officially in swing. The last two days have been super hectic but we have worked together really well at resolving any issues and making things as seamless as possible. For those that don't know, in my district to save money we only open 5 of the 10 elementary schools for summer school. Two schools join forces for 20 crazy days of summer session which means half of our kids have to learn new rules, new procedures, new teachers, new rooms and floor plans on top of the new schedules. Already today was a huge improvement from yesterday so I would say by the weekend we should have all the kinks worked out.

Pinterest is my new guilty pleasure. I just love going through and finding beautiful images and ideas for my life. The possibilities are endless.

My boys are both growing up so fast- I have no idea where the time has gone! I can't remember if I have said this or not but we have nicknamed them "Ham and Cheese". They both have their father's humor and LOVE to make people laugh. I really love spending time with them- whatever we are doing. For those that are curious- Lincoln is the "ham" and Caiden adds the "cheese".

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson. This is an amazing book. It is a really long book and a hard start but if you can keep going it is well worth the wait. Jay and I started the movie last night. It is 2 -1/2 hours long and has subtitles so we only watched the first half of it.

Last of all- I got a new car! I actually got it about a week and a half ago but I haven't blogged about it yet. I wanted to include pictures but I haven't taken them off my camera yet. Since my computer crashed and I lost them ALL (yes, I am still super bitter and probably always will be for awhile) I haven't trusted dumping them on my computer. At least, not until I have time to upload them to another site. Anyway, I got a 2007 Dodge Durango. Caiden named it the Burango Durango which I think is super cute. More on this later though.

Thursday, June 2, 2011


Today was our last day with kids and boy was I ready! The last two days I have been in a super funk. The kind that is really hard to get yourself out of. A bunch of changes are coming my way next year and I am just not okay with any of them.

1. A ton of my friends are leaving me so this will be a big change. A total of 6 people are leaving this year and we had 4 leave last year.

2. We have added Library as a special. Now instead of seeing my kids roughly 60 times a year, I will see them about 35. In the times that we aren't teaching our specialty area we will be teaching Communication Arts. This will be in addition to the Math groups we worked with this year. So I will be teaching 8 totally different things a day and have 20-25 minutes to plan for them every day. Scary....and possibly not legal.....

3. We have added common assessments to our curriculum. While I do think this is a good thing, now that we are going to see our students less, it makes me worry how much time I will have to actually teach my specialty. I am thinking instead of doing about 20-30 projects a year, I will maybe get to do 10 at the most. Half the time, half the projects. I just hope Art is still fun and not all about tests.

I am ultimately worried about them phasing out specials all together. Already we are considered "Extra Adults" by our peers and administrators. That is one of the things that really irks us too. Extra, as if we are not needed. What happened to the "whole child"? So much of Art is about problem solving and analyzing which is very similar to math. Don't even get me started on comprehension!

With so much uncertainty about next year, I am really looking forward to my summer break. Even if I am doing summer school.