This is my life as it comes hurdling by....

Wednesday, August 31, 2011


My Grandpa died.
I have been really sad.
I have cried every day.
I am still really sad,
but I have stopped crying every day.

We knew we had a limited time left with him so we were able to say goodbye. We actually went down two days before he passed and spent the weekend with him and my Grandma.

It was incredibly sad watching him those last few days but I am so happy I had the chance to say my goodbyes. I truly believe that was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. I will, however, have the lasting memory of him looking right at my boys, calling them ornery and blowing them kisses. They were actually blowing kisses at him first so it was really good to see him interact with them and really know who they were. At one point he took my hand, looked me in the eyes and said, I'm ready. That was hard to hear and at the same time comforting to know he was ready.

The funeral and visitation were absolutely beautiful. We got to spend time with family we hadn't seen in a long time. I got to snuggle with my twin cousins who are 5 months old and so incredibly sweet. My family spent time together remembering my grandpa and all the things that reminded us of him.

1. He always had change in his pocket. He would take it out, juggle it from hand to hand and ask you to guess (to the penny) how much change he had. If you guessed right, you got to keep it.

2. We played a lot of spoons when I was younger. My grandpa REALLY got into it so he would put a large serving spoon right in front of him. Later, the serving spoon turned into a ladle. Guess who won most of the time?

3. He would always smile and say, "Come here and love my neck Sugar!".

4. When we were ornery he would pull us close and get our faces with the whiskers on his face.

5. He would take us fishing only if we would bait our own hook and dig our own grub. He would however, take the fish off our line if we caught one.

He was an amazing man and I miss him like crazy already. If you have not read the book Heaven Is For Real, you must. I read it in one day this summer while I was on the beach. It really helps people cope with the loss of a loved one.

Are you like me and certain songs remind you of people, places or events in your life? Thanks to my sister, Libby and her husband Kurt, I have this beautiful and uplifting song that makes me think of my grandpa now.

PS- this is not my favorite version of this song but it was all I could find!



Anonymous said...

This is really sweet Jen. We are so very lucky to have such an awesome family! I've never heard that version, but it's good too! Love you! Lib

Lori O said...

So glad you got to say goodbye. I still miss my Grampa often, and it's been over 7 years. There are two songs that remind me of him and that time: "Remember When" by Alan jackson, which I think came out right around then. I pictured he and my gramma singing that to each other in their last days together. And then "When I get to Where I'm Going" with Dolly Parton and Brad Paisley. I choke up just thinking about the second verse now. Anyway, we are blessed to have wonderful Grampa's and great memories of them!